
Being human is hard. Being observant, possibly even harder. The hardest thing of all is caring. I care a lot, but all of us are breakable. That’s not making an excuse, because I know I could have been better, done better.
The only way the USA could have done worse in Afghanistan is if we had gone full scorched earth. Instead, we promised, and promised, and pretended, and pretended, that 20 years would be enough. And then we just walked away while most of us remained completely oblivious. A few of us blamed the Democrats. The people actually paying attention, the ones who tried and failed. Well, we are all angry at the broken promises and the return of the savage barbarians.
This is how empires fall. Our empire is crumbling while we refuse to see the man with no legs begging for a better existence. We would have to be able to see our own problems to solve the problems of another nation-state. We are going in the wrong direction.
This is me being honest about my journey. I’m haunted by my failures. I am haunted by the man with no legs.
Audio Memory #2
Unfortunately Pen, I have two similar regrets that popped up almost immediately. The first, walking through a slum in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia with polio victims many dragging themselves around on scarred, worn "legs" for lack of a cart. What keeps me sane - I can't remember the eye contact, I know I had.
The second thought, a couple seconds later - when I was hitch-hiking late 1970's through Portland Oregon at 3 in the morning, I came across a woman half in and half out of a car on the shoulder of the interstate. I ran up and saw that she was bloodied and battered and the driver telling me and my 135 pound body - you touch her and I'll beat the shit out of you. I didn't and he dragged her back into the car as he drove off. It's amazing how inaction can plague us every bit as much as our actions.
All we can do is keep trying to do better and opportunities will present themselves. AND take it easy on yourself, we truly are works in progress as long as we never give up. Thanks again Pen for a thought provoking post.
Wow, Pen, that was some powerful shit. I understand that haunts you but try to be gentle on yourself. Today's you would react differently than the you in Kabul that day.