You celebrate while I go back in time
The Fourth of July does not sit well with veterans
Some veterans may enjoy fireworks and celebratory noise-making. None of them are combat veterans. I say this with certainty. As a sub-class of humans, anyone who has been a participant, willing or unwilling, in any modern war, fucking hates it when you party with explosives.
You are having fun making noises that force myself and others of a similar backstory to flashback to various traumas. I have learned to let go of the anger I feel when the explosions start going off. Mostly.
I hope someone who does not understand what we’ve been through reads this essay. They tell you it is honorable to learn the killing arts. That’s a lie. They tell you that you are a hero. That’s a lie. They tell you that your sacrifice will be honored. That’s a lie. You’ll fade away just like people who didn’t sign up to live through hell and come back an empty shell of what they once were.
Trauma is real. Trauma multiplies. Trauma seeps into your core like cancer.
All I can think about while you are blowing up that shit above my home is that I wouldn’t mind if you were silent for the rest of forever. That’s as honest as I know how to be.
Don’t make loud noises just because you can. You’re more entitled than most humans who have ever walked this rock. I struggle and work to be kind, but those noises you are making make me think the skills I learned might need to be applied to you. Isn’t that ironic?
Boom! Boom Boom! Boom, Boom, Boom. Don’t play with the Boom Booms.
I hope your Independence Day is quiet, peaceful, and full of conversations that make you quieter and more self-aware of how temporary we humans are.
Agree. Fireworks are expensive indulgences that are at best an irritation. Our dog begins to pant, shake and drool with fear. We will enjoy an early meal with friends and be sure to be home with her. We'll play some music, close the blinds. Comfort her as best we can.
I haven't experienced the horrors that you have. But it occurs to me that if society gave a shit about those who have experienced combat, such events wouldn't occur.
Maybe there is something in the human psyche that just enjoys violence and explosions. Why? Most TV shows are almost required to involve brutality and abuse. I am weary of it. Repulsed.
Hope you find some peace and pleasant companionship tomorrow. There is a lot to celebrate. As messed up as we are, it's still the best country.
Very much to the point, and an extremely important point it is. What may be a light-hearted comment or cute little joke to one person, may be a horrendously traumatic trigger for another. Not to mention loud explosions for fun. None of us know what it's like walking in another's shoes.
I'm reminded of my brother back from Vietnam for about a year when he came out of a grocery store in NJ , just as a fighter jet flew a high-speed pass along the nearby beach. He dropped to the sidewalk, face down, shaking and unable to stop. Many years later, he recounted one of the last times he had heard the sound of a low flying jet - as his friends and fellow marines became a collage on the trees all around him.